Disgusting. There’s something about the imperative that originally appeared on the sign you see in the photo – “Never, but never” – that really gets on my nerves.
The sign was shown to me by the acting battalion commander, a bright-eyed, boisterous 25-year-old captain whose confidence and experience had earned him acting rights quite early in his career. We both felt sick as we talked about officers who had exactly that attitude and berated us condescendingly for daring to question their authority.
The beauty of having the incumbent battalion chief close to the age of the new generation, in my opinion, is that he can understand and often share the perspective of younger firefighters.
Times are changing. We no longer have to submit to an authoritarian, abusive relationship with an employer. People of all ages are realizing their value and no longer choose cultures inspired by this type of leadership. They literally just leave.
Please challenge me
The day the assistant chief showed me the sign, he was too afraid to change or discard it himself, so I went to work and improved the wording. I crossed out “Never, but never” and inserted “Always.” Now, don’t argue with me when dragon tongues are blowing out a window of a two-story, open-air apartment building and I demand a 5-inch supply, two preconnections, and three conductors, but let’s definitely discuss the decision I made afterward. We’re all going to learn a thing or two, so please challenge me, but do it respectfully, tactfully, at the right time, and with dates.
I think the biggest obstacle for public officials is that they forget how much power they have and that their words can cause harm without them realizing it.
I’m reminded of the power of my words when I get a warm, fuzzy “You’re the reason I joined the fire department” or “Remember (that circumstance)? It really touched me.” Sometimes yes, sometimes not. I always feel like an asshole when I don’t remember the incident or person, but then the sobering reality sets in: While my words can help so much, they probably also caused harm. Worse, people won’t tell me about those times for a number of reasons. Do they really think I’ll apologize? Not likely. “If she believed those things then, she probably still believes them now.” Plus, an apology would show vulnerability, and that’s the least desirable trait for someone a member thinks could hurt them again.
Which brings me back to BC acting.
Trust and respect
I have a theory: As a matter of self-preservation, officers should consider the consequences of their actions if a member becomes their superior one day. I was this guy’s captain when we were both in different departments, and then his battalion chief when he was promoted to driver. I went to a neighboring department as a captain, and when he transferred some time later, our friendship and officer skills only improved because we had practice giving each other feedback. Now I get to play captain from time to time while he acts as BC, and we know full well that we support each other in the switched roles.
It’s human nature to want revenge when we feel we’ve been treated unfairly. Either he’s really good at hiding it or I’ve managed to make him feel respected as a firefighter.
In fact, this is one of my favorite questions when I meet a new crew member: What makes you feel respected? This usually gets a blank stare. OK, what makes you feel disrespected? Simple. They start listing things: interrupting me, asking for advice and not following it, not looking me in the eye, etc.
If I can avoid stepping in poop, I do.
While studying for the BC test, I had the distinct pleasure of reading the Fire Chief’s Handbook cover to cover several times. I’ve long since forgotten how much floor space is recommended for office spaces and what screen angles you should maintain to prevent eye fatigue, but I’ll never forget the two things the book says you must have as a leader – trust and respect – and you have to give each of those things to get each of those things. That’s so true. People who verbally demand respect because “I’m your supervisor” or “I’m your manager” or “I’m your boss” still stick in my mind as absolute clowns.
In short, I don’t recommend constantly challenging authority just to make waves, but if you have some form of supervision, you’ll gain a lot by letting people know that you want them to challenge you if they think you’re in the wrong. If you give them reassurance and don’t take it personally, you’ll gain both their respect and trust.
